Sadly those who most need to apply this will believe it applies to everyone else. I saw this constantly in the family readiness groups, and now watch it transpire daily with the families of wounded warriors. Unless you are auditioning for Jerry Springer….
Don’t make drama. Seriously. No one else has time for it and you aren’t making yourself look good by bashing anyone else or having a public display of dysfunction.
We have all been wronged. Deal with it. If it is a criminal problem, use the proper authorities to take care of it. Otherwise start acting like an adult and get on with life. You are going to do stupid things. Yes, I said it: you WILL screw up. Intentionally, unintentionally, directly, indirectly, you will do things you regret. …and so will everyone else.
Think about it. When you accidentally turn in front of traffic you feel bad, but if someone else does, they surely meant to cut you off, right? If Linda ignored you at the last family readiness meeting, it must have been because she was mad at you, right? (Never mind that she was just diagnosed with a frightening medical condition…)
My point is that if you don’t know what is happening, don’t create a reason. Sometimes people do things that are irritating, stupid, or downright cruel. If it is something you can work out without causing yourself more harm, then do it. If it is something inexcusable or something that you cannot get passed, move on. Don’t keep living it.
If whatever is happening is intentional, do your best to move on or extricate yourself from the situation, and then get on with life. In the scheme of life it really doesn’t matter that Linda made snarky comments about your hair, or that Enda intentionally stole your assigned parking space.
Deployments come and rumors start. Joan’s husband might be sleeping with the neighbor’s goat, but is that your business? Edna might just be a horrible person, but does telling everyone about it make her less horrible? If the rumors are about you, live so that no one believes them: don’t compromise yourself. (The only exception to this is if you legitimately suspect there is a crime such as child or domestic abuse, in which case, please report it to the authorities, see that there is follow-up, and then keep your mouth shut.)
Either fix it or leave it, but engaging other people, and causing more stress for yourself is not a resolution. You cannot “win” at drama. Proving you are right is not helpful if you injure yourself or others along the way. I see a lot of wives who want to “prove” they are right by getting everyone on their “side”. Ladies, we are not in middle school, and this is not a popularity contest. Take care of yourself, and let everyone else worry about their own issues.